Sweet smile on your face as you sleep the pain away,
Andrei is resting in God's arms now,
He needed another angel in the Heavenly choir and that's why he had to go.
As you promised, you are still with us watching your children.

I never would have imagined the end would be like this, me comforting you.
Holding your hand, telling you not to worry was not an easy thing for me to do.
And even in your weakest hour you tried to comfort me too,
Caressing my face, and calming my soul as only a mother can soothe.

You have always been there through the thick and the thin
No matter what I've done, unconditionally you love never wavering.
When I told you of the mistakes I made and all the times people saw me fall
You simply nodded and gently replied 'so have we all'.
The key to success is learning from the past
Ensuring a brighter future is now the present task.

A pillar of strength even until the end
Fighting all life's battles, knowing it's triumphantly you would win
Pushing me to be the best that you know I can be
Reminding me to keep the faith and allow God to lead me.
Knowing it's through Christ that I can do all things
And as He never makes a mistake I will come through victoriously.

I miss you more than these words could ever say
The pain in my heart is from one unimaginable day
After I cried all that I could; my eyes still shed countless more tears
And when I try to sleep, I have nightmares of ten-thousand fears
I walk in footsteps on an unsure path
My load feels so heavy I am not sure I will last.

Finding relief in knowing I will see you again someday soon
Remembering all you taught me as...
I LOVE SO MUCH MAMA...

My dearest Mother, 

You have always been true.
No one could ever,
Take the place of you.

Thank you my gem,
Shining ever bright.
You were always my guiding angel,
Through each & every pitch black night.

My patient loving dove,
The beneficiary of my affections.
I know you will always be here,
To guide me thru life's afflictions.

Please accept this heartfelt thanks,
From me to you.
I love you so much,
And appreciate everything you do.

Some called him "andrei",
some called him "pinggoy"
His smile was his trademark,
wherever he went.
A room would brighten
when Andrei came in.

A son and brother so precious;
a friend so true!
Whatever he had,
he'd share it with you!
A thought, a deed, a kind
word for a while
But always, oh always,
He'd share 'His Smile'.

Our hearts are breaking,
our thoughts are going wild!
We've lost our friend:
We've lost our child!
"But only for a while,"
I heard Jesus say
"He's been chosen for the
Master's Bouquet!"

Hand selected by Jesus from
this 'garden of life'
Gone to Heaven!-He's
through with this strife!
Why is he gone?
God only knows.
But Oh what a treasure,
A "smiling rose!" 
We miss you...

Its been over eight months now
Since we've been apart.
You can see it in my eyes,
its tearing up my heart.
I cant believe your gone today,
I never got the chance to say;
to tell you all my secrets,
my silly old regrets.
But since you've left this world behind,
my life has been a mess.
Since then theres been less laughter;
only tons and tons of tears.
Just know that I will miss you
throughout my life long years.
You were my dear brother
You concord all my fears.
But now there is a whole there
where your life had used to be
You were my brother
And you are missed....
By Me!

Wishing Edvin's father a peaceful Father's Day.
Love to all ,
Rosemary sis of Alvin Cremeans
xoxo

My dear brother you shall never know,
Never know how much I loved you,
Never know what you meant to me,
My dear brother if it wasn't for you I wouldn't be who I am,
When I lost you I lost a part of me,
When i lost you I lost my chance,
My chance to tell you of my love for you,
I wish I could have just one day back,
One day to tell you the things I need to say,
One day to tell you that your are more then a brother,
You my brother are the best friend I shall ever have,
One day to tell you that you are missed,
Missed more then I could ever miss another,
I wish for this one day,
But I know it shall never come,
So I must whisper these words into the wind,
And hope it carries them to you,
Listen to the wind my brother,
For it shall be my voice,
My voice telling you...
 I Love You.

A brother is someone 

with fun-loving ways 

with wit and good humor 

to spare. 

He does thoughtful things 

without any fuss 

and when you're in trouble 

he's there. 

A brother is more 

than just part of the family.. 

he's also a friend 

through and through. 

And that's a description 

that certainly fits 

a wonderful brother like you. 

Our dear, sweet loving Andrei
God carried you away.
Andrei, we know you hear us
We think of you every day.

Oh, you were so special
A wonderful and loving son.
Truly a great brother, too,
And for everyone, such fun.

We think of all you loved
In your little bit of time.
Nature, wild life was your dream,
And of it you richly mined.

How the girls had an eye for you,
And how you'd eye them back,
You didn't sit on the sidelines, Andrei 
Activity - you'd never lack.

Andrei, you were such a special friend,
How you listened - and were always there.
Your love for little children,
Take them jeeping everywhere.

You left us yes, but not before
You made your mark to start.
So many have you in our minds
And also in our hearts.

There's Geli and Gelo, your niece and nephew
Children who are like no other.
And naturally, your kuya wad and kuya edrinne 
Your most adoring brothers.

How hard for us to miss you,
We fight from being sad.
Just know we'll always love you,

Andrei, with your mom it was rough sometimes,
But you worked it out.
That love was always at the core
Was never once in doubt.

You've passed on, dear Andrei
That we know. Accept it? Well, we must.
But one thing more from all of us,
And in this, your spirit can trust.

You're with us now, it's just that way,
As sure as skies above.
You'll always have our love.

A day that starts without a prayer 

is like an empty shell, 

and a day that ends without a prayer 

cannot be ended well; 

for when your heart turns HEAVENWARD

you find a sweet release, 

and you understand the meaning 

of "His mercies never cease." 

When life brings pain and sorrow 

which you feel too weak to bear, 

there's strength in God's abiding love 

and in the power of prayer. 

So never start a day unless 

there's a prayer within your heart, 

don't make a firm decision 

until you've prayed about it, 

for prayer is like a golden gift — 

you just can't do without it. 

And though at times you feel as if

your prayer has not been heard,

remember, God is listening

and He hears your every word.

He may not always give the things

you wished and hoped He would,

but in His love and wisdom

He does all things for your good.

 I wish I had the words to comfort you,
In all your pain and grief.

But I know there is nothing I can say or do,
to help you find relief.

Your numbness will soon subside,
and the pain and tears will be real.

Just remember no matter what,
It's ok to feel what you feel.

Each day may seem like a burden,
sometimes it will be hard to face.

But he will never stop loving you,
just because his in a new and better place 

Andrei will live on in your hearts,
you will all have memories to share.

And when your time on earth is through,
with open arms, he will be waiting for you there.
....in heaven

Just when I thought I was getting better, I had my moment again of sadness and extreme longingness for my youngest child.    
Yesterday at the church when all the mothers were called at the altar to be honored by their kids. I opted to stay in my seat because Andrei was not around to give me a  rose. When my friends approach me knowing what I have been through, I just poured it out by crying my heart out. The pain is still as enormous as it  was 8 months ago.

"I call your name from the deepest  pit, O Lord. Listen to my cry for help. Don't close your  ears when I  cry out for relief. Be close at hand when I  call to you. You told me not to be afraid. Plead my case  for me. O Lord. Reclaim my life." (Lamentations 3:55-58)

Don't think of him as gone away-- 

his journey's just begun

life holds so many facets--

this earth is only one...

Just think of him as resting

from the sorrows and the tears

in a place of warmth and comfort

where there are no days and years.

Think how he must be wishing

that we could know today

that nothing but our sadness

can really pass away.

And think of him as living

in the hearts of those he touched..

for nothing loved is ever lost

and he was loved so much.

I thought of you and closed my eyes
And prayed to God today.

I asked what makes a Mother
And I know I heard him say
A mother has a baby
This we know is true.

But, God, can you be a mother
When your baby's not with you?

Yes, you can He replied
With confidence in His voice.
I give many women babies
When they leave is not their choice.

Some I send for a lifetime,
And others for a day.
And some I send to feel your womb,
But there's no need to stay.

I just don't understand this God,
I want my baby here
He took a breath and cleared His throat
And then I saw a tear.

I wish that I could show you
What your child is doing today.
If you could see your child smile
With other children and say:

"We go to earth to learn our lessons
Of love and life and fear.
My mama loved me o so much
I got to come straight here.

I feel so lucky to have a mom
Who had so much love for me.
I learned my lesson very quickly
My mama set me free.

I miss my mama O so much
But I visit her each day.
When she goes to sleep
On her pillow's where I lay.
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek
And whisper in her ear.
"Mama don't be sad today,
I'm your baby and I'm here."

So, you see my dear sweet one,
Your children are OK.
Your babies are here in My home
They'll be at the gates for you.

So now you see what makes a mother,
It's the feeling in your heart.
It's the love you had so much of,
Right from the start.

Though some on earth
May not realize you are a mother,
Until they're time is done.
They'll be up here with Me one day
And you'll know that you're
The best one!

My Mom is a survivor,
Or so I've heard it said.
But I can hear her crying
When all others are in bed.

I watch her lay awake at night
And go to hold her hand.
She doesn't know I'm with her
To help her understand.

But like the sands upon the beach
That never wash away...
I watch over my surviving mom,
Who thinks of me each day.

She wears a smile for others...
A smile of disguise.
But through heaven's open door
I see tears flowing from her eyes.

My mom tries to cope with my death
To keep my memory alive.
But anyone who knows her
Knows it's her way to survive.

As I watch over my surviving mom
Through heaven's open door...
I try to tell her
Angels protect me forevermore.

I know that doesn't help her...
Or ease the burden she bears.
So if you get a chance, call to her...
And show her that you care.

For no matter what she says...
No matter what she feels.
My surviving mom has a broken heart,
That time won't ever heal.

It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today

Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one




Dear Myra, i thought these's words were beautiful As is your son Edvin.
Forever he will be rememebered.
God bless you Myra and your Family


John Lennon - Imagine

I just wanted to remind you Myra and your family that I am always




with all of my love. 
Rosemary
xoxo

This is for Tita Myra, Edvin’s mom, whom I am indebted all my life for making me share a part of her boy’s life to me. – Jen Alarcon (September 16, 2006, 8a.m. Manila, Phils. )

Encouraging 
Few would know that in times of my trying times he was there;
 I was in my lowest moment, 
alone at the back of the classroom, 
Wiping tears from time-to-time, 
mending a broken heart, he came;
Meddling I thought, but he tried his best to extend comfort…
I didn’t tell him why I was like that, 
but he researched, tried all means to know why . . .
From that time on he never ceased to call, 
just to have me entertained
Until I found out that cloudy day had passed, 
Edvin had caused it. . . 
Defender 
I was very young in the profession, very idealistic, sensitive,
With a number of admirers among classes 
and secret enemies in my brood;
He was always there to stand for me, 
defending me from his ill-mannered
teachers, sparing me from pain.
I remember, I opened up to him about a lesbian 
who kept on bothering me.
I didn’t know that he went haunting the person, 
when he found, he threw
curses on her and threatened to be violent 
if she would still come closer to me; 
she got the shock of her life!
That is how he was to me.
Valued one 
I believe he knows how invaluable he is to me… 
He will forever be a treasured friend.
I may not be there on his graduation, 
because of a call of the profession, I knew
he was embittered.
I may have failed to see him through 
at the time he was leaving, 
he had a hard time understanding it, 
I should have explained, 
yet I didn’t, thinking he’ll be more saddened.
I intentionally did not come, 
for I know it would be difficult… 
I couldn’t just see my most valued friend just go . . .
I never knew that a day before his departure 
to another land, was the last day
I would see him again.
“Idol.” 
That was how he used to call me. 
Little did he know that it was because of that
branded name that I strive hard on this life. 
That though I felt I am about
to fall, I would remember him calling me “IDOL”
He didn’t know how much elated I was, 
hearing his fondness on me . . .
When he won in the Speechfest,
the good Principal commended him.
He proudly said, “Eh si Alarcon ba naman trainer ko eh!!!”
When I was able to defend my thesis with flying colors,
he shouted it out to the whole world, 
posted it on his Friendster bulletin saying:
“Graduate na si Alarcon! 97 lang naman grade! 
Manang-mana sa akin!”
He told me that when he was feeling sad, 
he would think of me, that he wanted
to be like me… One day I’ll ask, “What happened?”
I am missing my “idol vin”.
Naughty
Naughty and playful as he was… 
Bolero din, kaya daming babae! 
Where would he learn it 
but to his equally naughty brothers! 
Once the poor first year
student showed me an excuse letter, 
signed by the eldest brother.
It goes this way, …” excuse my brother
for he suffered from gonorrhea.”
I have heard over the phone 
he cursed his brother who was laughing triumphantly,
when I asked over the phone if he already queried about it.
He was one of the “Bakal Boys” 
telling me that on the Christmas Party 
they ran out of utensils, so he had gotten 
all the spoons and forks in the canteen.
Now, I know why they have disposable utensils
at the canteen. 

We went out of town, in Tarlac, 
in the residence of one of his teachers (all my
friend teachers had become his friends, too.)
He was overjoyed to see a deep well, 
when Robby’s turn to take a bath 
he volunteered to have it pumped, 
and he did it so hard that the water
which came out was a muddy liquid, 
how would I be mad? He was
laughing so hard already?
One night he called me, and told me he learned 
from Eliza that we were classmates 
in Phil. Literature in English. 
He told me that Liza said she was good as a student. 
So he asked if that was true. 
I knew he was starting on me again… 
So, I told him, “She was good, 
but I got the Best in Phil. Lit that time!”
On the other line, he shouted, 
“Ate Liza, bobo ka pala eh!!! Sabi ni Alarcon!”
I was so ashamed, and told him to stop… 
But he was laughing hard again, 
how would I get mad? 

Attention-Seeker 
Yes, he was!!! I know it, 
I happened to be the youngest child, too.
On our way to Tarlac, the seats were by 3’s and 2’s. 
He grabbed my hand and forced me to sit on seats for two, because I said, we have to sit together.
He said, “Dito lang tayong dalawa. 
Hayaan mo sila sa likod!”
Sa Star City… he forced me to ride 
on the Cyclone Loop! It was a scary moment;
he wouldn’t listen as I begged. 
I held tightly at the post but he grabbed
me, and people were all staring at the scene. 
Tell me, do I still have a choice?
On his birthday, he was resenting the fact 
that I came to his classmates’ birthday 
who happened to have the same birth date 
as he was. I went because the parents, 
who had become friends to me, 
were the ones who made the invitation.
After that, I decided to go to his house. 
I bought cake for him… 
At first, he would not speak with me… 
nagtatampo… but after a while, he was happy.
I know at his back, he was smiling in spite of himself… 
He had me again.
Edvin, always finds ways to get my attention. 
Every test period, in all his years of stay at NTC… 
Kahit pa nasa College na ako, 
I would need to pay for his tuition… 
I had no choice, he would always arrive at my room. 
Leave the receipts and the money, 
then he would say, “O, kailangan ko na ‘yan bukas ah! 
And before I could speak, he was already walking away looking at me smiling… That's how endearing he was...

Nocturnal(?!) 
When would Edvin call? At night . . . 
My day would not be complete without his call. 
We almost have talked about everything… 
His desire to be a “gambling lord,” 
his pains, what he feels about life, his family, 
his joys, his girls and what he does to them ?! hehehe
When he was already far from me, 
he would also call when I’m in the middle of sleep. 
He would call when he was about to sleep. . . 
It breaks my heart to see his text messages so often, 
that he had hard time sleeping, and that he was so sad, 
that I have to be there fast, because he couldn’t wait,
things that he wouldn’t say, when you are just 
talking to him over the phone.
He had ways of letting you feel he was alright, 
though wanting in the inside…
One day, I’ll ask him, “why didn’t he wait… 
why didn’t he tell me things he tells
his kuya Wad or Robby…why?”
Last night, I again couldn’t sleep… I miss him so badly. 
My knight, my night. . .
He left me, one night… 

Darling
He was truly a darling… very likeable and endearing. . . Playful, mischievous, naughty? Call him such, 
but you can never deny the fact that those 
qualities really made him a very endearing person.
He went to my house a number of times, in the instant, 
he’s a friend to my brother, a son to my parents 
(my mom washed his polo, when he stayed overnight 
for his rehearsal for the Speechfest), 
and a Kuya Edvin to Rodnie, my nephew 
whom he would have bonding moments of play 
everytime he’s at the house.
He was an instant friend to all my teacher-barkada… 
They all know how we were. They were also there, 
at my side in this lowest part of my life… Now, I know he befriended them all because he knew, 
life would be hard without him… I needed them again, 
people who have known everything we had… 
Even Sir Saballo, was there for comfort.
Edvin is a darling, a charmer . . . 

a Revelation 
He used to tell me of his desire to join Speechfest, 
but also would tell me how the
idea would cause thrills on him.
One day, he told me… He’s soon to leave NTC, 
he’ll be leaving the Philippines, soon. 
He told me he didn’t want to be remembered 
as the notorious Edvin… 
So, I told him, it was the time he needed to be serious 
about the Speechfest… Talaga daw ba? “OO, I said.
One night, the phone rang… 
an enthusiastic and nervous young man, 
now with a bigger voice… told me he got a copy, 
and he will start memorizing. 
I told him every day he must memorize a paragraph 
or two and I would check on it.
Every night from then on, he would call once, 
twice, thrice… all the time, every
time he would master a part.
It took him few days, out of determination to master the piece… He knew he didn’t just have to memorize… 
“Vin, you have to know the piece, by heart…” 
He took me seriously that time.
One night, he called saying… 
“Kabisado ko na lahat! Brown out pa dito sa amin
ah! Pero kinabisa ko pa din!” . . . “Owwsss… 
malay ko ba kung binabasa mo? 
Hindi naman kita nakikita?” . . . 
“Sa pagkakataong ito, magtiwala ka lang . . .” 
A mature voice, a determined young man was speaking. 
I knew he really meant business.
A day before the Oratorical Contest, he waited for my off. 
I was teaching then in the College, My off was 8:00. 
He waited. At 8, I saw him, soaked with sweat all over. 
I asked from where he had been? 
“Syempre, nagaliw-aliw muna ko! Nag-basketball ako, 
tapos nag-bilyar…”
That night, we stayed late . .. polishing everything. 
He followed everything I said,
his movements, his stops and pauses, his hand gestures, 
how his voice must be… when to be loud, when to speak in a whisper… My student was intently listening and conscientiously following his teacher.
In the taxi on our way to school, he told me 
that one of his teachers said, “ANO?! sasali si Ang? 
Anong gagawin nya dun?” Galit ako, but I didn’t tell him. 
I just said that he had to prove them all wrong… Then, he touched my hand. It was cold… I knew he was nervous. 
Then, we prayed inside the car. 
He asked, “Paano kung guluhin nila ko? Patawanin?” . . . “Tandaan mo, huwag kang titingin sa kanila… 
Palaging lampas ang tingin sa ulo, 
para hindi ka ma-distract.” He followed.
I told his brother not to miss the event. 
We both watched, and knew he was not
just good, for he was EXCELLENT! 
My instruction was, when I raise my hand, 
that meant that he was getting fast. 
On the duration of the delivery, I didn’t raise my hand. 
I only did when he finished – with two thumbs up.
I left, confident he will win… He did! It was a revelation. 

Enthusiastic. 
That is how he was, every time he was onto something he would put all his energy onto it – wherever, whenever.
I wouldn’t want to go to Tarlac anymore, but he was persistent… I was forced to.
I wouldn’t want to go to Star City, again he was persistent, promising that his Kuya would drive me home 
“kahit madaling araw”
Though I would be sleepy already, 
when he calls and I would hear that voice full of life and enthusiasm, I couldn’t help but stay awake.
So full of surprises and life. . . 
always making his presence felt. That is how he was.
When I was transferred to the College Department, 
he would see to it that from time-to-time 
he would visit and just let me know he was there. . .
He would shout at the top of his voice while passing on the last door, “JJJJJJJjjj!” and through the first door, 
“ Wag kayo maniwala dyan, binobola lang kayo nyan!” 
Of course, the whole class would burst into laughter!
During examinations, he would be there. 
Because I have many coins on the table, 
he would comment, talking to my college students, 
“O ayan, pinagkakitaan na naman kayo ng teacher nyo!”
‘Yan si Edvin! Kung ang maraming estudyante, 
nanginginig sa takot sa akin. Sya ganyan talaga!
Once he sat inside my class. He was at the back, 
listening to the discussion. I knew he enjoyed 
the discussion, after that as we were walking 
down the hall, he said, “J, iba ka na… 
professor ka na talaga. Mas gumaling ka pa . . . ,
 (palakpak ang tenga ko!) 
Kaya lang yung isang estudyante mo, ang
galing din NAGMA!” . . . “Ha, anong nagma? 
You mean magna (as in magna cum laude)” . . . “Hindi NAGMA . . . NAGMAmarunong! Halata
namang bobo!” HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Joker ‘di ba? 

Incomparable 
I would ran out of words, describing him, 
talking stories about him, but
what would I say, that will best fit? 
but INCOMPARABLE… He is one and only in my life. 
He, alone understands how I feel. 
He alone can make me laugh despite sadness all around. 
He was one of the reasons why I do good in my area. 
He was the one I look forward to seeing again…
When no one was around to listen, he was there… When I needed to go somewhere, volunteer yan palagi sumama!
Who would call me “J” again? as tough yet sweet as he does… Si Edvin, “O, J ang upo mo umayos ka nga!” 
“J,dito ka sa kanan ko!” “J, baka nag- asawa ka na ha!” “J, sana andito ka” “J, nasan na ang pic mo?” 
“J, date tayo sa bday ko! “J, may gift ako sa ‘yo” 
“J, iniisip kita ngayon..” Vin, iniisip kita ngayon… di ka na naman tumupad sa mga pangako mo sa ‘kin.
Si Edvin, nanalo sa Speechfest, ipinusta pa din… 
One teacher dared him that he would win
 he would give him a hundred! He bet a hundred also that he would… He did, he won, he had money, I asked for a treat, chided, “Nasa’an ang professional fee ko?” 
Wala daw. KISS NA LANG daw!
He never ceased to amuse me… 
never ceased to surprise me. Ayan si Edvin.
He had one part of my heart, exclusively for him alone… 
which even time could not erase… 
I have loved him and I will forever will…